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We’ll be honest: if you’re not struggling while taking an online learning course, you’re not learning much. Learning something new takes a lot of perseverance. Learning something difficult can pay off, but it can also lead to negative self-talk. The consequences of negative self-talk can be dire.
The little voice in your head that takes over when you get frustrated? That voice can be a force for good, but in excess, it limits your ability to believe in yourself. It can also prohibit you from reaching your truest potential.
Negative self-talk is something most of us experience in our lives, and it’s not an uncommon thing to happen. It’s easy to see how a 36-year-old stay-at-home mom might get frustrated returning to school. For example, she could be either ‘too old’ to go back to school, not ‘smart enough,’ or has ‘too many commitments on her plate.’ The consequences of negative self-talk can affect our mental and physical health if we don’t keep an eye on it.
If you notice these negative patterns in your thought processes, keep reading. This article goes over four consequences of negative self-talk and how to beat it. Don’t let negative self-talk have lasting effects on your body, relationships, or life.
What’s Negative Self-Talk?
“I give up!”
“I can’t do this.”
“I’m making too many mistakes!”
Does any of that sound familiar? You might not have said or thought those words, but you might have heard others say them. Negative self-talk is common, but it isn’t helpful for a healthy mind or relationships.
Negative self-talk can contribute to higher stress levels and affect our health. The hidden danger of negative self-talk is it starts off small. Before you know it, it’s snowballed into something much larger and out of our control.
Negative self-talk (mental or verbal) diminishes your belief in yourself. It limits the actions you take to live the life you want. If you notice yourself saying something negative, consider the following consequences of negative self-talk.
The Ramifications of Negative Self-Talk
The consequences of negative self-talk can affect more than you might think. You might not notice its effects because it’s often a slow build, and many of us are less self-aware than we think. This form of self-talk is infectious. It can sneak into your life and change your entire perception before you know it’s happened.
Here are four consequences of negative self-talk that anyone should be aware of:
- Narrow-minded thinking. Narrow-minded thinking limits how creative you are. It limits how many perspectives you can see to make a sound judgment. The more you tell yourself something negative, the more you may believe it. The lasting mental effects of that can be difficult to shake off. Narrow-minded thinking restricts you from accepting new ideas. It often reveals itself in how you speak of others.
- Depression. Negative self-talk may lead to depression-like symptoms. Fatigue, feelings of worthlessness, or emotional numbness are some symptoms. If you’re experiencing similar symptoms, or see them in someone else, consider seeing a doctor.
- Perfectionism. Perfectionism can stem from various things, but negative self-talk can exacerbate the problem. We’ve seen students say things like, “I can do better. How did I miss that?” Returning to school as an adult comes with both inside and outside influences. Sayings such as, “You’re too old,” or even, “You have other commitments you need to focus on instead.” These statements force you to put undue stress on yourself to succeed, even when you’re doing great.
- Broken Relationships. Negative self-talk can harm more than you. It can reflect on your significant other, friends, or colleagues. Negative self-talk can create a barrier between yourself and those around you. Continual amounts of criticism can take its toll on relationships.
Negative self-talk effects can be difficult to handle, but it’s something you can improve upon. The first step to recognizing negative self-talk is realizing that you may be guilty of it. Becoming more self-aware and how we impact others is a productive step forward.
How to Beat Negative Self-Talk
To oversimplify, the best way to beat negative self-talk is to become more positive. The process of becoming more positive may be easier for some and harder for others. It’s not easy to change your perspective (of yourself or others) at the drop of a dime. Here are some places you can start to unwind your negative self-talk and thoughts:
- Adjust your mindset. Practice your positive self-talk by rephrasing negative comments into positive ones. This is an intentional process. Once you notice you’ve said something negative, pause and see if you can rephrase it. When you sit down to do something you know you get frustrated with, think or say something positive. This process can help you broaden your perspective. You might learn to see how this can benefit you rather than upset you.
- Catch the patterns in your behavior. If you’re experiencing negative self-talk, it might be triggered by certain things. If you can identify these things and how they make you feel, you can work on adjusting your perspective. For example, if you’re a stay-at-home mom with kids and you become overwhelmed. You might tell yourself, “I’m not a good mom,” or “I’m terrible at this.” Think for a minute about how your child understands what you’re saying. Would you say that your child was a terrible kid? That they’re terrible at what they do? Of course not. Be aware of the patterns in your behavior and how you could approach them.
- Have a backup buddy. Have a significant other or a friend willing to help prompt you to reframe your thinking. This can help you gain some self-awareness of how you speak. Make sure you set boundaries on when and how they can prompt you. This is so no resentful feelings unfold, and everyone remains respectful and helpful.
- Talk it out. You can talk it out with yourself, or if you have someone willing to listen to you, speak with them. This way, you can challenge your negative thinking and separate reality from where your thoughts have led you.
- Ask yourself if it’s right for you. When handling a frustrating situation where you are getting nothing of value, consider if it’s right for you. Walking away can be the most efficient way of stopping negative self-talk.
Conclusion
Negative self-talk can have devastating consequences if it’s not realized. Luckily there are ways that you can identify it, learn how it affects your life, and what you can do to beat it. This list is not exhaustive. We’ve only covered four consequences and a few ways to combat negative self-talk. There are many other options to stop the negative cycle.
Don’t let that little voice in the back of your head stop your enjoyment of your studies, friends, family, or life.
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